Con-spiracies

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“Loonar module” (Moon landing hoax theory)

moontake

Landing on the moon is a source of national pride for 90 percent of Americans. It is a source of personal satisfaction to the other 10 percent, for whom seeing a hoax in it is preferable to celebrating mankind’s greatest accomplishment.

While mostly a fringe moment, the idea has been endorsed by the Fox Network and that greatest of modern astrophysicists, Whoopi Goldberg. The most frequent protest focuses on an allegedly waving flag. It is pointed out the moon has no atmosphere and no wind. But the flag is not waving. The creases in the flag were due to it having been folded during the trip, and the only time it moves is when it’s touched. After this touch, the flag takes much longer to settle than it would on Earth, due to the lack of atmosphere critics had been so fond of addressing.

Another argument centers on the Van Allen Belt, where Earth’s magnetic field intensifies solar radiation. Critics say a trip through the Van Allen Belt could never be survived. But this would be like arguing that an X-ray would be fatal. A two-second exposure to an X-ray is fine. A two-hour exposure would not be. It would take at least a week of hanging out in the Van Allen Belt doing astronaut stuff for someone to be killed.

Conspiracy theorists gleefully note the lack of exhaust flames when the astronauts began their return trip. But this is because the propelling agent was a mixture of nitrogen tetroxide and Aerozine 50, which produces transparent gas.

The lack of stars in the background is also raised. Having passed a freshman-level photography class, I know that shots taken with a fast exposure and small aperture fail to capture faint objects on a dark background.

A couple of more arguments focus on a Hollywood explanation. Critics think that shadows from objects going in different directions indicate multiple light sources. However, if there had been multiple light sources, the astronauts and equipment would cast more than one shadow. The shadows go in multiple directions because they are distorted by a low sun and uneven surface. Keeping with the movie studio theme, propononets of the hoax theory point out a supposed letter ‘C’  on a moon rock, and claim this is a stage prop. However, the letter isn’t on the original NASA negatives or prints, and is a hair or fiber that got onto a reproduction.

Still another claim is that since moon dust is dry, it wouldn’t take a boot imprint, much as how dry sand won’t take prints. But moon dust is unlike sand. Its particles have different sizes and shapes. Its more like talcum powder, which does take prints when dry.

Perhaps the laziest point is wondering how a photograph of Neil Armstrong could have been taken unless someone was standing there to snap it. The shot was taken on a still camera mounted on the Eagle lander. Moreover, remote cameras left on the moon snapped the departure. These were relatively well-known facts at the time and even the most superficial investigation would have revealed this answer.

Frustrated by these refutations, moon landing hoax proponents will resort to challenging NASA to end the supposed controversy by having the Hubble Space Telescope take photos of equipment left behind. But all that’s left is the 12-foot wide Eagle lander, much too small an object to be captured. And even if it could be photographed, the idea that it would silence hoax proponents is itself a hoax. Conspiracy theorists, by their nature, consider any contrarian evidence to be part of the conspiracy.

For instance, they cited Neil Armstrong’s reticence and few public appearances to be proof he was hiding something. Simultaneously, Buzz Aldrin’s high public profile, including his decking of a conspiracy theorist, was evidence that he was feeling the heat of the hoax coming undone.

The only way hoax proponents could possibly be convinced is if they were sent to the moon themselves. I’ve heard worse ideas.

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“Conspiracy theory theory” (Conspiracy theories, obviously)

GRIBBLE
The Sept. 11 attacks were a conspiracy. Osama bin Laden, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, and at least 19 fellow Islamic terrorists conspired to attack the United States.

So conspiracies are real. But so, too, is a movement that finds conspiracies where none exist. There are three varieties of conspiracy theorist: The single event, the systematic, and the super.

The most commonly-believed of the single-event conspiracies is the Kennedy assassination, the only time polls have shown conspiracy theorists to be in the majority. There are three reasons for this. First, this is the one which has the most sub-conspiracies to choose from. Second, it is the one that has been most aired in the mainstream media. Finally, as we will see, conspiracy theories can be a way of trying to make sense of the world. It is hard for some to accept that Camelot was done in by nothing more than a commie drifter loser.

The most prominent conspiracy theory of recent years has dealt with Barack Obama’s birth place. Part of it was the result of a man with dark skin being elected president. Someone who sees his world changing in ways he dislikes would prefer to think sinister forces are at work.

For some birthers, this was just another in their inter-connected collection. But for those who adopted only this theory, it helped them deal with election results they couldn’t handle. Rather than asking, “Where did we go wrong? Why did we fail?,” it was more attractive to declare, “The other side cheated.”

Statements by Hawaiian officials, two birth certificates, two newspaper birth announcements, and verification by FactCheck.org were all dismissed. This highlights a conspiracy theory’s most defining feature: Anything that disproves it becomes part of the conspiracy.

Another single-event conspiracy theory centered on George Zimmerman, in which an everyday event like an SUV overturning morphed into a wide-ranging attempt to bring about his redemption. One piece of “evidence” was that the SUV family hadn’t posted about it on social media. Of course, if they had posted, the same theorists would have written, “There is no way they would have had the presence of mind to post within an hour of almost dying.”

In the systematic conspiracy theory, a shadowy group of Jews, Bilderbergers, Free Masons, or Bohemian Grove members are plotting world domination. Theorists seldom offer a name in association with any of these alleged power mongers. In the past, names were given, but this fell out of favor when persons began asking, “If he was all-powerful and all-evil, why did he die without his goals being met?” For a while, the deaths were presented as a hoax, but each succeeding year made it difficult to convince even the most credulous.

Then we have the super conspiracy theorists, in which it’s all thrown together. Some cases are so extreme that, when polled, there were those who answered “yes” to both these questions: “Is Obama bin Laden alive?” and “Was he already dead before the U.S. Navy SEAL strike?”

Now we’ll delve into how a person comes to such a way of thinking. Sometimes, the reason is self-satisfaction. They like feeling they are privy to special information and are smarter than the masses.

They will usually claim to be rooting out evil government officials and their media lackeys. But this falls flat when actual misdeeds surface. In one week last year, the IRS scandal, Benghazi, and Fast and Furious were topping the news. If theorists had really been concerned about government malfeasance being shielded by a compliant media, this would have been their dream week. Instead, most conspiracy theory sites didn’t mention these. And Edward Snowden, who would have been a goldmine to anyone wanting to expose government corruption, was instead labeled a plant or false flag.

If there really were a group of impossibly cruel and powerful people controlling world events, that would mortify most people. But for a conspiracy theorist, the idea offers comfort. It is reassuring to think that, rather than there being random evil in the world, it is all being controlled. It is also appealing to think they have some power over it, as they can recognize and expose it. It also offers them the chance to establish a simple world view of right-or-wrong, us-vs.-them, good-against-evil.

While there have always been conspiracy theories, the ideas have exploded exponentially on the Internet. Here, believers can flock to have their confirmation bias stroked in a virtual world free of cognitive dissonance. Of course, this can appeal to any group or agenda, but is especially reassuring to someone seeking refuge from dark overlords and brainwashed masses.

Conspiracy theorists argued that police officers were near the scene of the Boston Marathon bombing so their heroic response could be filmed. Officers knew a bomb was about to explode, so they stood by it. Welcome to inside the mind of a conspiracy theorist.

In the most disturbing conspiracy theorist action I’m aware of, Gene Rosen, who harbored Sandy Hook survivors, was bombarded with threats and hateful insults. Incredibly, his CONSISTENCY was presented as a sign his eyewitness reports were false. Conspiracy theorists argued it proved he had rehearsed it. 

Sometimes, conspiracy theorists form their conclusion even before the event. I covered an exercise in which military and civilian emergency response teams practiced for the detonation of a nuclear dirty bomb. My article found its way to a conspiracy website, where posters excitedly pointed out that a false flag was coming.

There may be no mindset I am further removed from than that of conspiracy theorist, given my belief in Occam’s Razor and my Libertarianism. I am aware there are a few Libertarian conspiracy theorists, and they confound me greatly. They believe a government that is incompetent to build roads or schools is able to seamlessly pull off mass shooting hoaxes, 9/11, AIDS, and tornadoes.